I am going to hell...

Sam Hart

2007-08-27 17:10:51

So last week my wife and I were lucky enough to find a Wii at a local video game store. We were already getting a lot of stuff, so we didn't actually get any games for it at the time. Thus, all we've been able to do with it is play the fun (if shallow) Wii Sports and goof around with the various free features of the Wii.

One of those features is the ability to create Miis. A Mii is a digital avatar you can create for use in various Wii games. For example, your Mii can be used in the Wii Sports games. When you box, you box with your Mii persona. If you have enough Miis defined, you can play the Wii Sports baseball game and all of your Miis will be on your team. Additionally, your Miis can leave your Wii and go out to visit other people's Wiis (so your little Mii can show up sometime in the future on someone else's Wii Sports baseball team). It's all pretty cool stuff.

Anyway, my wife and I proceeded to make our own Miis... and everything was good. At least, for a while...

I was the first to make a Mii, and after 30 minutes or so I feel I came up with a pretty reasonable approximation of what I look like now:

Sam's Mii

It's not perfect, obviously. For example, you can't make characters realistically fat. Additionally, there's no "balding with long hair" hairstyle, and my lazy goatee+facial hair isn't there. But, otherwise it's a good approximation of what I look like (except thinner and with a bit more hair). I even put in my prescription sunglasses which I never leave home without. All in all, the look I'm going for is kind of a "Dude" look (from the Big Lebowski) and I'd say my Mii looks like a half-way point between what I actually look like and what I'd like to look like.

Next up, my wife made her Mii:

Jesness's Mii

Again, not perfect, but actually much closer to what she looks like than mine was.

So with our own personal Miis out of the way... what's left to do but make funny ones? At first we're just doing the standard deformed facial features to make giant freakish Miis... but soon, we start making evil and wrong Miis. For example, I made a butch lesbian Mii named "Dykarella" and Jessica made a stoner flower child called "Rainbow". But the really offensive ones were to follow.

Next up, I attempted to make a Divine Mii... and I think I did a pretty good job (again, not perfect, but good):

Divine Mii

The real Divine

Then, I went off the deep end. I have no idea what possessed me... but I made a Mii character called "J.T." (I'll leave it up to you to figure out what that stands for) who looks like this:

There has to be a special place in hell for anyone who would make a Mii so politically incorrect, offensive, and racially insensitive. I just hope that place has a Ferris Wheel....